Now, It's Final DEATH STORY
by Wildnight
Summary: This is a DEATH STORY! Death of a major character! When Blair is caught up in an explosion, a realization is made and a mother and a partner must let go.
1. Chapter 1

Now, It's Final

Detective James J. Ellison stood at attention by the graveside of his partner and his friend, Detective Blair J. Sandburg. The service had been over for almost half an hour, but still Jim stood there. He didn't want to let go yet. He didn't want it to be final.

TWO WEEKS EARLIER

Blair Sandburg was always running late. It was the one constant in his life. And the one that most annoyed his friend and partner, Jim Ellison. This morning was no different than any other morning.

"C'mon, Sandburg! Get a move on in there! Simon wants us in place by 8:00 AM sharp! If we're late, you're going to explain it to him."

Blair Sandburg came out of his bedroom, half dressed. He was buttoning his shirt with one hand and holding his shoes and socks in the other hand.

"I'm sorry, Jim! I just couldn't get going this morning. I'll be ready in 5 minutes tops! I'll get coffee at the station."

"Quit talking, Sandburg and get in gear!"

Blair sat down on the chair and put on his socks and shoes. He got up three minutes later. And he was ready to go. Jim handed him his coat and gently pushed him out of the door, locking it behind them. They got into the station and up to Major Crime in the allotted time. Sparing Blair an explanation to Captain Simon Banks.

Most of the day was spent on the stakeout for the robbers they had been tracking most of the last week. Jim had been assigned as lead detective in the case since it had been high-profile places that were being robbed. Simon wanted Ellison and Sandburg in the thick of things in case the robbers decided to become more adventurous. But nothing happened as far as the robberies went. Jim got them permission to go home early.

On the way home, Blair told Jim that he wanted to stop by the herb store to pick up some tea he was out of and some spices he wanted to try. Jim indulged the younger man, only because he knew that Blair really enjoyed going into the exotic store. After the first time, though, Jim didn't step foot inside the store. It was torture on his senses. Even if he had Blair beside him to help to dial down his senses. Jim pulled up in front of the store and placed his hand on Blair's arm.

"Don't take all day, Chief. I want to have supper at a decent time. Okay?"

"Okay, Jim. It shouldn't take me more than 10 to 15 minutes."

"I'll expect you in a half an hour then."

"Ha! Ha! Real hilarious, Jim."

Blair got out of the truck and walked towards the doors of the Asian Experience. Jim took his eyes off Blair and concentrated instead on the antics of three squirrels about half a block down the street. The explosion was totally unexpected. Jim whipped his head around, trying to spot Blair. But he couldn't find him. Jim grabbed his cell phone and called 911, demanding police, fire and paramedics as soon as possible. Then Jim jumped out of the truck and got as close as he could to the building. He still didn't see Blair in the rubble of the building. He tried to zone in on where the door had been, but there was nothing there now. Jim pulled back before he zoned on the destruction. It wouldn't do anybody any good if he zoned now. Jim heard the sirens coming towards the location. He waited until the firemen got out of their truck.

"Were you here when it happened?"

Jim got out his badge and showed it to the firemen.

"Yes, I'm Detective James Ellison, Major Crime, Cascade Police Department. My partner went inside, just as it blew."

"Do you know what caused the explosion?"

"No. I wasn't able to get too near. I haven't found Blair yet. That's my partner. I don't know how many others were inside the shop."

"Okay, Detective Ellison. We'll try to find your partner. You stay here out of the way."

Jim reluctantly turned away and walked back to his truck. But he kept an eye towards the destruction. He got out his cell phone and called Simon Banks at the station. He knew that Simon would want to know what happened.

"Banks."

"Simon, it's Jim. There's been an incident. It's Blair."

"What happened, Jim?"

"We were on our way home when Blair told me he wanted to stop by the Asian Experience to get some tea and herbs. As soon as he opened the door, the place blew up."

"What about Sandburg?"

"I don't know, sir. The firemen are searching the area, looking for him. I couldn't filter things out when I tried to find him. I don't know if he's alive or dead."

"Okay, Jim. I'll be there in 10 minutes."

"Sure, Simon."

It was about the time Simon arrived when the firemen carried Blair's limp body out of the shop. They laid him down on the waiting gurney and Jim was immediately over by his side. He took Blair's limp right hand in his.

"Hold on, buddy. I'm right here. Hang on."

"Sir? We need you to move back. We need to evaluate him."

Jim reluctantly backed away. He felt the hand on his shoulder and turned to face Simon Banks who had just found him.

"It's not good, Simon. They have to do CPR. He's not breathing on his own. He has numerous broken bones. Oh, God! What if he doesn't make it?"

"Jim? Don't go off half-cocked. I need your full attention here. I'll need a report of everything that happened."

"I didn't see the explosion. I was looking elsewhere. Blair usually takes so long in the store, chatting with everyone there. I turned when I heard the explosion. I tried to find Blair, but I couldn't."

"Okay, okay, Jim. Let me drive you to the hospital. It looks like they're ready to transport Sandburg."

Jim let himself be led to Simon's car. He got into the passenger's side and closed the door. Simon followed the ambulance to Cascade General Hospital. Along the way, he phoned Joel and told him where he was and why. He promised to call later with more news.

Jim didn't listen to the conversation. Truth be told, if he had concentrated, he wouldn't be able to hear Joel's end of the conversation. His Sentinel abilities were muted. He knew it in the back of his mind, but he didn't want to accept it.

They reached the hospital and waited in the ER for word about Blair. Before the doctor had come out, Brian, Henri and Megan joined them. They explained that Joel had stayed at the station in case anything came up. All of them waited solemnly in the family room right off the ER. Finally, after about two hours, a doctor came to the room.

"Are you here for Blair Sandburg?"

"Yes. I'm his partner, Jim Ellison. These are his co-workers."

"Mr. Sandburg is in very critical condition. We're going to try to take him up to surgery to see what we can do. He coded twice on the table while we were assessing the damages. Does he have any immediate family in town or nearby?"

"Not in town. He only has his mother and she's usually hard to get hold of. I'm down as Power of Attorney for any procedures or life-threatening situations."

"Yes, I notice that now, Mr. Ellison. We're going to take him up to surgery and see what we can do. You can wait in the waiting room up on the third floor. And you can fill out the necessary approval forms and information. But I have to tell you, it will probably be some time before we come out to talk to you."

"If it's all the same to you, doctor, I'll wait. Blair is like a brother to me."

"Whatever you want, Mr. Ellison."

The whole group went up to the waiting room. It was almost 10 hours later when the doctor came to see them. By that time, Jim was the only one still awake. He turned when he heard the door opening.

"Are you here for Blair Sandburg?"

"Yes, I'm Detective Jim Ellison. Blair is my partner and my friend. How is he?"

"We have him listed in critical condition. We're keeping him in recovery for an extended amount of time. We don't know whether he'll survive or not. He's a real mess on the inside and there was only so much we were able to do for him in the condition he's in. And he also has a severe skull fracture."

"Can I see him?" Jim was hoping they would say yes. He had tried many times before, when Blair would be in the hospital. Jim was always able to see Blair.

"I'm sorry, detective. But we have him in a drug-induced coma right now, because of his physical condition. We are monitoring him closely. He wouldn't even know that you are here."

Jim didn't like the decision, but he accepted it. He turned back to the others. Most of them had waked up. Rafe was waking Megan. Jim walked over to stand beside Simon.

"Can you take me back to my truck, sir?"

"I'm driving you home, Jim. Someone else can bring your truck to the loft. Give your keys to Brown."

Jim got out his keys and handed them to Henri Brown. Henri took them before Jim could realize what he had done. Jim followed Simon to the elevator. He spoke to Simon.

"I have to find Naomi. I know Blair got a letter from her a few days ago. I don't know where he said she'd be. I didn't pay attention to what Blair was saying."

"It's okay, Jim. You'll find the letter and find out where she is. I'll help you look, if you want me to?"

"No, Simon. Blair doesn't like other people going through his things. I'll find the letter. I know where he keeps them."

Simon drove Jim back to the loft and offered again to go up with him. But Jim steadfastly refused.

"I'm okay, Simon. Really. I'll be fine."

Simon watched as Jim walked into the apartment building and disappeared from sight. He drove off, sending up a silent prayer that Blair survived his ordeal. He'd hate to think about Jim all alone.

Jim walked into Blair's bedroom and found the letters in the top drawer of the bureau there. He knew that was where Blair kept his letters from his mom. Jim opened the one on top and read it through.

'Blair –

I thought I'd drop a line to see how things are going. I'm headed off to another retreat. This one is in Boulder, Colorado. I know, I know. It is kind of cold this time of year, but we'll all be warm and content. I wish you could come and join me. Even if you brought Jim with you, it would be okay. I think I'm going to be staying here for almost a month. If you get some free time, just call and leave a message. I'll get it. It's called the Psychic Horizons Center & Church of Inner Light. Don't tell Jim that. He'll wonder what exactly that entails. If he does find out, tell him it's none of his business. The phone number is (303) 440-7171. I hope things are going well with you and Jim. Did you ever ask him about that thing we discussed the last time? You need to find out such things, Baby. It's in your best interest. I'll close now. We're about to start daily meditation. I love you.

Naomi'

Jim went to grab the telephone and called the number for the Psychic Horizons Center & Church of Inner Light. He left a message with a Mindy to have Naomi Sandburg call him ASAP. He emphasized several times that it was urgent that she get hold of him. That it concerned her son. Jim hung up the phone and wandered around the loft for several minutes, unsure what to do. He finally sat down on the couch and rubbed his hands over his face and through his short hair. He leaned back on the couch and drifted off into a very light sleep several minutes later.

The phone was what woke him up. He got up and answered it. It was Naomi.

"What's wrong, Jim? Is it Blair?"

"Yes, it is, Naomi. Blair was involved in a bombing at a shop. He's in critical condition at Cascade General Hospital. Can you come? The doctor doesn't know whether or not Blair is going to make it. Can you come?" Jim was practically pleading.

"I can be there by tomorrow, Jim. Is he awake?"

"No. The doctor has him in a drug-induced coma right now. I haven't even been able to see or talk to him at all."

"I'll be there, Jim. I'll call back with my flight information."

"I'll pick you up at the airport, Naomi."

"Thank you for calling, Jim."

Jim went to take a shower after hanging up from the call with Naomi. He wanted to go back to the hospital and look in on Blair. He was going to get inside this time. No excuses from the doctor. Jim was back at the hospital by 9:00 AM. He got permission to look in on Blair. He walked into the room, taken aback by the sight that greeted him. Blair was totally surrounded by machines and probes. Jim reached the bedside and tentatively reached out to touch Blair on the forehead, ever conscious of the bruising even there.

"Hey, buddy. I'm here. You hang in there, you hear me? Your mom is coming and I'll bring her by as soon as she lands. Damn it, Blair! I should have been paying attention when you reached for that handle. I might have been able to stop you. Stopped all this pain that you have. I'm sorry, Blair."

There was no movement from the still form in the bed. Jim knew that the machines were what were keeping Blair alive. He suspected Blair wouldn't be able to survive without them. And he knew Blair's wishes were that he wasn't to be kept alive by artificial means. But Jim just couldn't take that step without Naomi with him. She would be the one to tell the doctor to remove the respirator.

Jim was called to the nurse's station about an hour later. It was Naomi, with her flight information.

"I figured you might be at the hospital when I couldn't reach you at the loft. Were you able to get in to see him?"

"Yeah, I did. It's serious. When is your plane coming in?"

"5:30 this evening. Can you be there?"

"Yeah, I'll be there Naomi."

Jim hung up the phone and went back to Blair's room. He walked over to the bed and leaned over, whispering to Blair.

"Your mom is coming, Chief. I'm going to pick her up at the airport. And I'll bring her straight to your side. I know you'll want her nearby."

Jim patted Blair's shoulder one last time before he turned and left the room. He wanted to find out what had been determined about the bomb. He knew that three other people in the shop were already dead. Jim went into the station. Simon saw him and called him into his office right away.

"Did you get hold of Naomi?"

"Yeah, she's due in at 5:30 this evening. I told her I'd pick her up from the airport. There's no change in Blair. I was able to get in and see him this morning. I don't want him to die." The last sentence was practically whispered.

"Jim? You have to be patient. He was seriously hurt. If he makes it, he makes it. If he doesn't, he doesn't. Why don't you sit down for a little while?"

"Okay." Jim sank into the chair in front of Simon's desk. "Did you get a report about the bombing?"

"Yeah, it came in this morning. Apparently, it was payback for nonpayment on a debt. Mob related, although they haven't gotten the connection yet."

"Blair was innocent in this whole thing. God, Simon! He's just got to make it! He can't die!"


	2. Chapter 2

Later, Jim went to the airport to pick Naomi up. He dreaded seeing Naomi under these circumstances. But he knew he owed it to Blair to bring Naomi to him. Jim was early to the airport and waited at the gate for her to come off the plane. Jim spotted her immediately. She hugged Jim and held him close. Jim could detect some of the same smells from Naomi that he smelled on Blair.

"I'm glad you could come, Jim. Thank you."

"Let's get your bags and I'll take you by the hospital to see Blair."

"Is there any change in him?"

"No. He's the same. But I told him you were coming."

Jim carried Naomi's bags to his truck and put them in the back end. He put the tarp over the bed of the truck. He helped Naomi into the truck and drove towards the hospital. They rode up the elevator to Intensive Care. Jim let Naomi go inside the room by herself. He stood outside the room, consciously not listening in.

Naomi walked over to the bed and looked down at her son.

"Oh, Baby! I'm so sorry about all of this. Jim explained to me what happened. It wasn't his fault and it wasn't your fault. You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. I love you, Blair."

Naomi leaned over and gave Blair a kiss on the cheek. She was careful to avoid the respirator. Tomorrow, she would have a talk with the doctor. She knew that Blair didn't want to be kept alive by artificial means. But she didn't want to let Blair go, either. After all, he was her only son. After about a half an hour, Naomi came out and rejoined Jim.

"He looks so quiet and unnatural."

"Yeah, I wish he'd wake up and let us know he'd be okay." Jim was looking through the window into Blair's room.

"Can you take me by a hotel? I need somewhere to stay for the time I'll be here."

"You can stay at the loft, Naomi. Blair would want it that way. And I want it that way."

"I don't want to inconvenience you, Jim."

"It's no inconvenience, Naomi. And I insist. You're family."

"Thank you, Jim. That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me."

Jim drove them both home to the loft after he said goodnight to Blair. He carried Naomi's suitcases into Blair's room. They both went to bed early, both of them tired.

Jim went with Naomi the next morning when she returned to the hospital to talk to Blair's doctor. She asked him when Blair would be taken off the respirator.

"You have to understand, Ms. Sandburg. Your son is in very critical condition. Even if he came to right now, I'm not sure that he would be 100. With the skull fracture, it brings along with it the possibility of brain damage. We'd prefer to leave things the way they are at this time."

"Do you know about his wish not to be kept alive by artificial means?"

"Yes, Ms. Sandburg. I noticed that on his chart. But we want to give him a chance to make a recovery."

"I want his wishes taken into account. I'll take the responsibility."

"We'll do it tomorrow, Ms. Sandburg."

"Thank you, doctor."

Both Jim and Naomi walked into the room where Blair lay. Jim wanted to go against Blair's wishes and hold onto him until he could get better. But then he thought that Blair wouldn't want to hold on if he was less than he was before or if he was in a lot of pain. He knew that he couldn't go against Blair's wishes. Jim sat on one side of the bed and Naomi sat on the other side. This would be the final day they would have with Blair. Unexpectantly, Jim let his tears fall. He didn't even try to hide them from Naomi. He didn't care who saw him. When it was getting late, Naomi got up from her side of the bed and walked over to Jim.

"I'll let you say your goodbyes, Jim."

Jim only nodded and watched as Naomi left him alone in the room. He turned his attention back to Blair.

"I know this is what you want, Blair. It's just so hard to let go. I never told you this, Blair. I love you. You're like the younger brother I always wanted to have. Steven and I were never as close as you and I have become over the years we've been together. Who would have ever thought you and I would become so close? Certainly not me. Especially after my initial reaction to you. I was just amazed that you kept coming back for more. Nothing scared you away. And when you proposed to becoming a consultant with the Major Crime department, everyone jumped at the chance to keep you. Everyone, Blair, accepted you. I want you to know that. I know you can hear me. I believe in the thought that comatose patients are influenced by outside stimuli. I just wish that we had more time together. I'll make sure your Sentinel project is protected. I'm sorry, Blair."

Jim let his tears fall again and let his head drop to the bed. He kept his hand entwined in Blair's. He stayed that way for several minutes. Then he got up, looked down on Blair, and turned and walked away from the room. He went out to where Naomi was waiting for him. Naomi patted Jim on the arm and then walked into the room. She didn't really want to this either. She sat down in the chair that Jim had recently vacated. She took Blair's hand within hers.

"Hey, Baby. You know, I always thought that someday you would become a famous anthropologist. And that I would be able to introduce you as Dr. Blair Sandburg, my son. I know that if it had been possible, it would have happened. But I also know why you didn't want to push it. You and Jim are as close as brothers. I understand that now. I didn't get that before. I'm sorry I didn't. I wouldn't have interfered had I known what good friends you and Jim had become and what exactly Jim was to you. I know you said you forgave me, but I'm still sorry." Naomi paused a minute, wiping away a few tears that had made their way down her cheeks with her free hand. "I thought you followed Jim around because you liked the thrill of pretending to be a cop. I know when you leave this earth that you'll be in a better place. But I suspect it won't be too far away. I have a feeling that you'll be Jim Ellison's guardian angel. You'll watch over him. Just as you always have. No one ever expected it. Not even you, Blair. You have this innate ability to see the good in everyone. I always marveled when you were growing up how you would just walk up to strangers and talk to them like they were long lost friends. And you would take up their cause just because they were now your friends and you'd never back down on a friend. I raised a caring, compassionate young man. I'm proud of you, Blair. And know that I'll always love you."

Naomi got up and gave Blair a kiss on the cheek. She then raised her hand and caressed his cheek. She turned and walked from the room, wiping away more tears. She walked over to where Jim was standing, took his hand within hers and led them out of the hospital. Jim drove them home to the loft. There was silence between them. No words were necessary.

The next morning, Jim went into the station while Naomi went to the hospital. He had told Naomi to call him when it was over. Jim thought it was something that should only be between mother and son. And he had already said his goodbyes to Blair. It would be worse to hear Blair's last gasp and the last heartbeat. It would stay with him forever. And that was not the last image of Blair Sandburg Jim wanted to remember. He might even zone on it and he didn't want to take that chance, although going with Blair held a certain fascination. Naomi understood why Jim didn't want to go.

The call came two hours later. Naomi was crying into the phone. Jim told her he would be there as soon as possible. Jim went into Simon's office, and his tears started to fall. He told Simon that it was over and that had had to go to the hospital to be with Naomi. Simon insisted on driving Jim to the hospital and Jim agreed. Simon called Rhonda into his office and explained what had happened. He asked her to make the announcement to the others in the bullpen and that he would be back later. Rhonda took Jim into her arms and told him how sorry she was. Jim thanked her and brushed back some of her tears.

Simon drove Jim to the hospital. It still amazed him that Blair Sandburg could be dead. And not because of anything connected to the Cascade Police Department. Maybe Blair was just destined to die young. They found Naomi still in the room with Blair. Jim walked in and instinctively searched for the familiar heartbeat. Blair's heartbeat had always been just like he was – bouncy and carefree. But it was quiet in the room. Simon, who had followed Jim into the room, walked over to Naomi and took her into his arms to comfort her.

"I'm sorry about this, Ms. Sandburg. Blair was one of my best detectives. He cared about the victims of the crimes as well as solving the crimes. And he was always able to keep Jim in line. They had a special relationship."

"I realize that now, Captain Banks. Blair always liked Jim and defended him whenever I would try to blame any of his problems on Jim. I couldn't understand why my baby would want to hang around policemen. End up living with one. And then becoming one!"

Jim walked over to the bed and looked down at the still form lying there. He knew deep down in his heart, that what made Blair Blair was no longer there. He had passed on to another dimension. Jim threatened to zone on the body. Until he turned away and walked out. Simon and Naomi followed shortly afterward. Naomi walked over to Jim and got him to sit down beside her on the bench that was there.

"I don't know how much about Blair in regards to his final wishes you knew about?"

"We didn't discuss it a lot. I knew that he had a will."

"He wanted to be cremated. He believed, like I do, that once your body is dead, all that is left is a shell. The essence of a person has left when it dies. I was thinking we could have a memorial service for him."

"I think that Bla…" Jim dissolved into tears again. He rested his head on Naomi's shoulder.

"Sh-h-h-, Jim. It's okay. Blair is in a much better place. He has no more hurt and no more pain."

They stayed that way for several minutes until Jim straightened up, sniffled and wiped away the tears from his eyes. He got out his handkerchief and blew his nose.

"I'll make all the arrangements, Jim. I don't want you to worry about any of it."

"Thank you, Naomi. For being here. And for having Blair. He was special – my best friend."

They left the hospital a short time later. Jim and Naomi went back to the loft. Simon told Jim to take as much time off as he needed. As soon as Jim walked into the loft, he was assaulted by Blair's unique smells. He walked directly to the small bedroom under the stairs. The doors were closed. Jim opened the door and looked around the room. He had always complained to Blair about leaving a mess and being unorganized. But, surprisingly, the room was neat. And Jim suspected Naomi hadn't cleaned it up. It wasn't perfect, but it was neat. Jim's eyes were drawn to the bedside table where Blair kept his alarm clock, a lamp to read by and the latest book he was reading. Also on the table was a picture frame. Jim focused on the picture in the frame. It was Jim and Blair, shortly after Blair had graduated from the police academy. His hair was still short and Jim was ruffling it, making it even more unruly than it was normally. Jim smiled. He remembered after Blair had gotten his hair cut, he complained constantly that he could never do anything with it. Luckily, Simon allowed Blair to grown his hair back out. It was almost as long as it had been when Jim met Blair. Jim closed the door and turned back towards Naomi. She was in the kitchen, making sandwiches. Jim walked over to her.

"Naomi? I was wondering…?"

She looked up from the sandwiches. "Yes, Jim?" Practically the same gaze Blair would often fix Jim with.

"Do you think it would be possible for me to get a lock or two of Blair's hair? I know that it sounds weird, but…"

"No, Jim. It doesn't sound weird. I totally understand. I'll ask."

"Thank you, Naomi."

"Let's eat, Jim. I can't let you neglect yourself."

Jim obeyed the voice. Just like he had always obeyed Blair. Both had the same quality. Gentle authority.

The memorial was held three days later in Cascade Park, near the fountain. No one missed out on the significance of the fountain. But it was a peaceful place and a perfect day. There were friends of Blair's from his many varied interests. There was a short opening by a religion professor from Rainier. He remembered Blair as a sixteen-year-old kid who absorbed everything that was presented to him. Then it was opened up to anyone who wanted to say something about Blair. Jim waited until several others had done it before he got up enough courage to say anything.

"When I met Blair Sandburg, he was twenty-six years old. He intruded my quiet, peaceful world with his jungle music, bright colors and loud voice. Just the opposite of me." Jim paused and let a chuckle escape as his eyes started tearing up. "But, he wormed his way into my life, into my house and into my heart. He became my best friend, my partner and my brother. He saved my life. Looking back on it now, I wish I had known him sooner. He would have made my life more bearable. He started out as an observer, a civilian ride-along with the department. At the time, he was going for his doctorate in Anthropology. He was looking for what he called a "sentinel". Someone who had all five senses heightened. He found what he was looking for in me. Until now, the knowledge of his dissertation subject has been kept confidential. But, I want the world to acknowledge that Blair Sandburg was brilliant and a genius. He taught me how to deal with my gifts and stayed by my side to help me when needed. Through this, we became friends. I was rather dubious at first, but of course Blair won out. He always knew best. He knew what to do."

The memorial service lasted well into the night. Jim stayed through it all. He looked over at the pictures Naomi had blown up to show her son at various points in his young life. Jim especially liked the one that showed Blair dressed in grown up clothes as they hung off his small frame. Blair had to be about five years old at the time. And he had a Fedora hat on his head, pushed back so that his face showed through. There was the patented Blair Sandburg mischievousness showing through in the eyes. He would ask Naomi for copies of the pictures. There was no worry that Jim wouldn't remember Blair, but he wanted to be privy to this also. Both Jim and Naomi were tired when Jim got them back to the loft. Jim went upstairs and got ready for bed. He lay down and thought he would go right off to sleep. But he was wrong. He lay in the bed. He thought about Blair. And the fact that it was all over now. He whispered to the darkness.

"If it's true about all that you used to talk about, Blair, then I know that somewhere you are looking down on me. My guardian angel. I guess that makes up for the fact that I was always your Blessed Protector. If I can talk to you like this, I think I'll do just fine. And before you start to worry, I won't give up my Sentinel abilities. You taught me that I can't just turn them on and off at will. I would never go against my Guide. But, I'll never be able to do all the things I was capable of doing while you were by my side. We were quite the pair. I know, I know. A pair of what? You would have loved the memorial service. I was able to be totally honest without you by my side to push me into it." Jim sat up in his bed, pulling his legs up under him, the way Blair used to sit around the loft. Jim smiled a sad smile full of loss. "Maybe there was divine intervention. I've decided I want to celebrate your life, Blair. You never got the recognition deserved of you for discovering a full-blown honest to goodness Sentinel. I was happy that you were able to receive your doctorate. And the party we had afterwards… Let's just say that I've never had so much fun in my life. You brought fun into my life, Blair. You gave all that to me, Blair. When I didn't even deserve it. I'm going to make sure that the world knows who Blair Sandburg was – both the anthropologist and the policeman. I'm going to talk to Rainier and see about establishing a scholarship in your name. Maybe I'll ask my father and brother if they want to help contribute to it. They were at the memorial service, Blair. In fact, there were people at the memorial service that I've never seen before. From all over the country. You've touched many lives, Blair. But, you chose to spend the most time with me. I thought at first it was because of the sentinel thing. But then you told me it was about friendship and I understood."

Jim stretched out in his bed again and fell off to sleep a short time later.

He slept late the next morning. He woke up to the smell of fresh coffee brewing. He was momentarily confused. Then everything came crashing back to him. He got out of bed and pulled on his robe. He walked down the stairs to the kitchen area. Naomi was in the living room, looking out the balcony windows.

"Blair loved that view. I think that's why he never wanted to leave the loft."

"It is a magnificent view. I was thinking, Jim. Blair loved Cascade. I think I want to leave his ashes here. We can even get a burial plot. I think he'd want that."

"It's fine with me, Naomi. Whatever you want to do."

Naomi had set it all up. There was a small, private ceremony held. It was Naomi, Jim, Simon, Joel, Henri, Brian and Megan. Plus the rabbi Naomi had found to perform the service. It was over now. Jim still stood there, knowing that now he would have a place to come to and talk to Blair. Although Jim suspected he could talk to Blair almost anywhere. But this would give him privacy and it was a beautiful view. Naomi understood Jim wanted to be alone.

"This is the final act, Blair. I know that you're in a better place. And you're safe. But it doesn't make it hurt any less. The ones responsible for the bombing were caught. They're trial will be coming up and they will be charged with four other murders besides yours. There is no way they'll get off. I'm sorry, Blair. I know I've apologized for that day since it happened. And I'll continue to apologize for it. It was unforgivable for a Blessed Protector to do. And for a Sentinel to do such a thing to a Guide. I'll never forget you. You don't forget how to breathe or how to walk. And you were as common as those things and so ingrained into my mind and consciousness. I'm sure over the next several weeks, months, years, I'll be back her a lot. Or if I'm in the loft and you hear me talking, listen in. No doubt, I'm talking to you. I'm not going off the deep end. It was just always easier running things past you. Except for the really big things. Eventually though, we talked those out too. So I'll be talking to you, Blair. Thank you for my life."

THE END


End file.
